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You Are Worth It

“I am depressed today” almost all of us have said this or felt this at one time or another in our life but according to the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) – Depressive disorder, frequently referred to simply as depression, is more than just feeling sad or going through a rough patch. It is a serious mental health condition that requires understanding and medical care. Left untreated, depression can be devastating for those who have it and their families. And then there is another side and as the World Health Organization (WHO) stated, “At its worst, depression can lead to suicide. Over 700,000 people in the world die due to suicide every year”.

I know one of those 700,000 who lost their battle with depression. On the outside he seemed to have everything going for him, a loving wife, two amazing daughters who were just starting their lives after college, a partner in a company that was having a successful year, a supportive extended family, and more friends than most people could ever claim to know. He was always the life of the party from the first time I met him in college until the last time I saw him in July. I knew he suffered from bouts of depression. And I knew that it affected his behavior when I saw him, or more likely did not see him, because he did not want to do anything. His wife and daughters would say, “He doesn’t feel well today” but those of us in the know, knew he was in the midst of one of his bouts. He tried, boy did he try to beat this disease. He saw a doctor; he was on meds, and he struggled to overcome this debilitating disease but in the end it won.

I am so proud of his wife and daughters because they are talking about depression. They are not hiding the fact that he lost his battle and that his life ended when he died by suicide. They are using his death as a teachable moment. They are talking about depression and suicide. They have included it in his obituary, in their Facebook posts, in their conversations with anyone that will listen. They are spreading the message that someone who was always there for everyone, who was a little league coach, a proud father, a devoted husband, and an amazing friend can suffer from depression. Not everyone is okay. There is nothing to be ashamed of by seeking help. Check on your family and friends, I mean really check in with them. Let them know there is help available and keep encouraging them to seek that help. As his daughter said, “Everyday should be suicide prevention day. Everyday someone struggles and thinks they are alone when they have a whole army of love ready to fight with them. Mental health has a stigma in this society that needs to be broken especially with men. It does not make you weak or unmanly, it makes you a human who just needs some help.”

So to honor my friend and his beautiful family I am asking you- please get help if you need it. There is hope. You are worth it. I just wish he knew he was worth it. See you on the other side Bubba.

About the Author

Pic of Deputy Director Amy Smith
Sr. Director of Operations and Communications for HCDVCC,
Amy Smith
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Community Share Op-eds Sexual Assault

Harris County Domestic Violence Partners are Working Together

“Law enforcement efforts alone will not sufficiently address the symptoms of crime. We are faced with a public health crisis, and it will require all of us, working together to overcome it.

This is a public health crisis and as a City, we will and must address the crisis through law enforcement, public health practitioners and community partners working together.

NO ONE CAN ESCAPE ACCOUNTABLILITY.

With the collaboration of all stakeholders, including business owners, faith-based leaders, and organizations that work with those experiencing family violence and mental illness, I am confident that we will reduce violence and emerge as One Resilient City-One Unified City-One Safe Houston.”

Mayor Sylvester Turner (February 2, 2022)

Harris County Domestic Violence Partners are Working Together

Harris County has experienced an increase in the severity of violence in domestic violence cases and a spike in domestic violence murders over the last few years. The pandemic brought unprecedented challenges with deep impacts to safety and wellness to Harris County residents, especially those impacted by domestic violence. “I am grateful to ALL the community partners, and law enforcement agencies, for working together with the Houston Police Department’s Major Assaults & Family Violence Division, Family Violence Unit allowing us to continue to do everything we can to make sure Houstonians are safe. I want to thank the Harris County Domestic Violence Coordinating Council (HCDVCC) the Harris County District Attorney’s Office- Domestic Violence Division (HCDA-DVD) and Aid to Victims of Abuse (AVDA) to name a few, who have worked tirelessly during this crisis.” Lt. Kira Webster, Major Assaults and Family Violence Division, Family Violence Unit.

HCDVCC began hosting Family Violence Investigators Alliance Meeting in 2013. The Investigators Alliance was a recommendation that came out of the Community Safety Assessment of Law Enforcement Services in Harris County that HCDVCC conducted in 2011-2012. This allowed Family Violence Investigators from across the County to meet on a quarterly basis with each other and the Harris County District Attorney’s Office. As a result of the relationships formed at the Alliance and to provide a coordinated community response to domestic violence during the pandemic, leadership from HCDVCC, HCDA-DVD and the Family Violence Units from the Harris County Sheriff’s Office and the Houston and Pasadena Police Departments began weekly ZOOM meetings. The weekly meetings allowed for real time conversations related to the isolating parents and children in their homes, while separating potential victims from the network of friends, neighbors, teachers, and other individuals capable of reporting the signs of abuse and helping those at risk escape a dangerous environment. Our conversations confirmed with crime analysis that the pandemic isolating impacts increased the risk and severity of the injury for domestic violence victims. In the early days of the pandemic, the meetings produced a poster campaign to outreach in areas of town with a high rate of domestic violence. These posters were placed in apartment complexes, grocery, and convenience stores in those areas with information on how to get help. These weekly meetings continue today and not only have been beneficial in discussing cases, trends and gaps but have become almost a support group for those who attend.

Harris County is working on prevention of violence and access to essential services, such as justice and policing, social services, helplines and coordination of these services, to provide support to those who experience and witness violence.

Domestic violence is one of the most common crimes to which law enforcement respond; yet it is often misunderstood. By understanding what domestic violence is, what best practices are when responding, and what resources exist to support their work, law enforcement can build the skills, capacity, and comfort to address these crimes and those involved with expertise and care.

One of the priorities, recently identified at the weekly meetings, was the need for updated and on-going training for investigators. On May 25th, HCDVCC partnered with AVDA to provide an 8-hour Texas Commission on Law Enforcement Course #3901 in person training for investigators from HPD, HCSO, PPD HCDA and several Constable’s Offices on Domestic Violence. The topics covered the dynamics of intimate partner violence with an emphasis on common victim and perpetrator experiences and behaviors; sexual assault, stalking, animal abuse, and strangulation in the context of intimate partner violence; protective order enforcement and violations protocols; immigration law and the impact of traumatic events and complexities of the manifestation of trauma. Overall, the investigators provided positive feedback regarding the training with one investigator stating, “Training was excellent in explaining multiple versions of domestic violence and how it related to the entire community-very informative in all areas.”

We are grateful that we can continue to have successful collaborations that provide a coordinated community response to address the ongoing crisis of domestic violence in Harris County.

About the Authors

Pic of Deputy Director Amy Smith
Amy Smith
Senior Director of Communications & Operations,
Harris County Domestic Violence Coordinating Council

Lieutenant Kira Webster
Houston Police Department
Major Assaults & Family Violence Division
Harris County Domestic Violence Coordinating Council Member- Intimate Partner Death Review; Harris County High Risk Team; Harris County Policy Working Group; Harris County Law Enforcement Weekly Check-In & Harris County Strangulation Task Force

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Op-eds

The “new” HCDVCC History

November 1st marks the 11th year of the “new” Harris County Domestic Violence Coordinating Council. The new and improved version began on a cool crisp morning at a local Starbucks because Barbie Brashear and Amy Smith took a leap of faith and said it’s now or never to jump start the mission of DVCC – “to create collaborations that maximize community resources, increase safety for victims of domestic violence and hold perpetrators of domestic violence accountable”.
But the seeds for HCDVCC were planted in 1995, when a group of people began meeting to strategize about how we can make it safer for victims in Harris County and how we could hold their offenders accountable. With a lot of arm twisting, begging and just right out demanding- Cindy Merrill, Gail O’Brien and Amy Smith convinced then District Attorney Johnny Holmes to partner with then HPD Chief Sam Nuchia, who was brought to the table by Vicki King, to convene a meeting of Stakeholders in the Community to address this issue. Jeff Basen-Engquist and Rhonda Gerson were the behind- the -scenes supporters and cheer leaders to get this meeting off the ground. So, the first meeting of what was to become HCDVCC meet in April of 1996 to begin the long journey to what we are today.
There are so many people that have contributed to our mission over the years by attending meetings, serving on the Board, working on “Best” Practice Protocols, participating in our Community Safety Assessments, guiding, and advising on how and when to apply for grants, and just generally supporting our work to fulfill our mission.
What started off in 1996 and revitalized in 2010 is so beyond what we could have imagined in our wildest dreams. So, thank you to all who have worked tirelessly to support us- we couldn’t have done this without you, and we look forward to seeing what the future holds.
We will be celebrating our founders at “Hats Off to HCDVCC” our postponed event on February 11, 2022.

About the Author

Pic of Deputy Director Amy Smith

Amy Smith is the Deputy Director of HCDVCC.