Tag: domestic violence awareness month

DVAM

November: A Month of Gratefulness

Post author By Rebecca Councill
Post date November 1, 2023

As the calendar pages turn and we step into the crisp, autumnal embrace of November, we are reminded that this month carries a unique spirit of gratitude. With Thanksgiving just around the corner in many parts of the world, November serves as a poignant reminder of the importance of acknowledging and appreciating the blessings we have in our lives, especially our cherished loved ones.

In a world often bustling with busyness and distractions, it can be easy to overlook the simple yet profound treasures that fill our hearts. November offers us an opportunity to pause, reflect, and express our gratitude for the people who bring love, warmth, and meaning into our lives.

The Importance of Gratefulness:

Gratefulness is more than just a fleeting feeling or a seasonal sentiment; it’s a powerful practice that can enhance our overall well-being and strengthen our relationships. When we express gratitude, whether through words or actions, we not only acknowledge the goodness in our lives but also foster a deeper sense of connection with the people who matter most to us.

Reminding Others of Gratitude:

While expressing gratitude is a personal experience, November encourages us to share our appreciation openly, particularly with our loved ones. Here are some meaningful ways to remind those we care about how much they mean to us:

Handwritten Letters: A heartfelt letter or note, written by hand, can convey your gratitude in a personal and touching way. Share specific memories or qualities you admire in the person to make your message even more special.
Quality Time: Spend quality time with your loved ones. Whether it’s a leisurely walk in the park, a cozy evening at home, or a long-overdue catch-up over coffee, the gift of your time speaks volumes.
Acts of Kindness: Small acts of kindness can make a big difference. Cook a favorite meal, lend a helping hand, or surprise them with a thoughtful gesture that shows you care.
Verbal Appreciation: Sometimes, a simple “thank you” and “I love you” can brighten someone’s day and remind them of your gratitude. Be sincere and specific in your compliments.
Create Memories: Plan special activities or outings to create new memories together. These shared experiences can deepen your bond and provide more reasons to be thankful.
Gifts from the Heart: Thoughtful gifts, chosen with care and consideration for the recipient’s interests and preferences, can be a tangible expression of your appreciation.
Support and Empathy: Offer your support during challenging times. Let your loved ones know that you are there for them, ready to listen, empathize, and assist in any way you can.

The Ripple Effect of Gratitude:

When we openly express our gratitude to our loved ones, we not only strengthen our relationships with them but also inspire a culture of gratitude in our communities. Acts of kindness and expressions of appreciation have a ripple effect, encouraging others to reflect on their own blessings and share their gratitude as well.

In this November, let us embark on a journey of gratefulness that extends beyond a single day or month. May we remind ourselves and those around us of the immense value of our loved ones and the joy they bring into our lives. As we cultivate a spirit of gratitude, we contribute to a world that is warmer, more connected, and filled with the love and appreciation we all deserve.

Tags awareness month, domestic violence, domestic violence awareness month, dp, dv nonprofit, trauma informed

DVAM

Domestic Violence Awareness Month

Post author By Amy
Post date October 30, 2023

Today marks the end of October. A day that is filled with costumes and candy, but it is also the end of a month overflowing with press conferences, trainings, galas, walks, and vigils to commemorate Domestic Violence Awareness Month. One month of recognition among the many months of causes and awareness does not mean the impact of the pandemic of domestic violence is not there the other eleven months. Those of us that work in this field understand that domestic violence is a 24/7/365 problem. While we appreciate the time, attention and funds that are given to DV during October we know that so much more is needed.

We share “our” month with another epidemic, breast cancer. While both are “women’s” issues it seems it is so much easier to support breast cancer because we never hear anyone question what someone did to get breast cancer like we constantly hear the victim blaming about DV- “Why did she stay?” “What did she do?” “I would never allow myself to be in that situation.” We see pink everywhere- on athletes, news anchors, cars, badges, and sidelines yet we rarely see purple.

The numbers keep fluctuating, but there is never a minute, much less an hour or a day that goes by, that there is not some type of domestic violence incident. We keep hearing the numbers are up, the numbers are down but does it really matter? Even one incident is too much. Everyone deserves to live in a home free from not just physical violence but emotional, reproductive, and financial abuse as well. Children deserve to have a safe place to lie down their head at night without waking up to shouts, thumps, and bumps in the night. We need to stop the victim blaming. We need to hold those who cause harm accountable. So many more resources are needed for both the victims and those who cause the harm. Affordable housing, affordable childcare, employment, and a living wage for all.

While the month of October exhausts us with all the events and remembrances just imagine the fear and exhaustion a victim lives with constantly. Let’s be there for them, let’s stop blaming them. A DV survivor is the strongest person I know because they are doing or have done everything than can to survive. So, let’s celebrate their survival and honor those we have lost. Let’s continue to do that 24/7/365 until we can eradicate this horrible pandemic.

Tags awareness month, domestic violence, domestic violence awareness month, dp, dv nonprofit, trauma informed

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Houston Police Department (HPD) 42nd Annual Hispanic Officer of the Year Awards Reception Honored Family Violence Detective Kassandra Garza for 2023 Non-Uniformed Hispanic Officer of the Year!

Post author By Rebecca Councill
Post date October 12, 2023

The 42nd annual Houston Hispanic Police Officer luncheon recognizes outstanding efforts of HPD officers who go above and beyond their duties. Detective Garza was named the 2023 Non-Uniformed Hispanic Officer of the Year.

Detective Garza displays a high degree of professionalism for victim/survivors to share their experiences of abuse and assault empowering victim/survivors, with hope of enhanced engagement with the criminal justice system and prosecution. Detective Garza maintains engaged compassion while at the same time ensuring respect and impartiality for all participants. Detective Garza completes thorough and complete investigations into the serious crime of domestic violence and ensures warrants are executed due to the high risk of ongoing violence. Detective Garza is a team player within our squad and always willing to assist other detectives. Detective Garza attends trainings related to domestic violence “best practices” and resources available to the community and works cooperatively with the citizens to prevent crime, enforce the law, preserve the peace, and provide a safe environment.

We recently collaborated with Project Beloved to install the soft interview room(s) within our department which allowed for hard conversations related to domestic violence and sexual assault. Project Beloved was founded following the brutal rape and strangulation incident. Working with the Office of Community Affairs Detective Garza assisted with the Spanish video voice over translation with compassion and grace supporting the founder of Project Beloved as she described her experience as a mother of a murder victim in hopes of preventing future murders. Detective Garza is a passionate advocate for victims of domestic violence and sexual assault proudly representing our department and gave a voice of hope and outreach to survivors/victims.

Tragically, Detective Garza’ extended family experienced a domestic violence murder firsthand with a family member who was kidnapped at gunpoint in Pasadena and later found dead of a gunshot wound in Houston, with police naming her ex-boyfriend as a suspect and the trial pending. Detective Garza has displayed personal courage and fortitude to provide comprehensive, collaborative services for everyone affected by domestic violence while passionately working to end this epidemic.

Finally, Detective Garza each day performs her duties in an exemplary manner proudly representing herself with all the many titles she has among them mother, daughter, aunt, friend, and Detective of the Houston Police Department. Detective Garza serves as an inspiration to us all for the dedication to service she displays each day to ensure our community is safe. Detective Garza proudly represents herself as a member of the Hispanic community and in everything she does she is compassionate and attempting to help people. Detective Garza truly represents the positive future our department has due to her dedication and professionalism.

About the Author

Kira Webster, Lieutenant at the Houston Police Department

Major Assault & Family Violence Division

Tags awareness month, det kassandra garza, domestic violence, domestic violence awareness month, family voilence division, honored family violence det, houston police department, houston police dept, sexual assault, sexualviolence, trauma informed

DVAM

Understanding and Creating a Safety Plan: A Guide for Domestic Violence Awareness Month

Post author By Rebecca Councill
Post date October 12, 2023

Domestic Violence Awareness Month is a crucial time to share knowledge, spread awareness, and provide essential resources to those in need. One such crucial resource is a Safety Plan.

A Safety Plan is a personalized, practical plan that includes ways to remain safe while in a relationship, planning to leave, or after you leave. Safety planning involves how to cope with emotions, tell friends and family about the abuse, take legal action, and more.

Below is an outline of what a Safety Plan is, how to create one, how to keep it private, and what to do if you need help.
What is a Safety Plan?
A Safety Plan is a comprehensive and detailed plan designed to prioritize your safety and the safety of your children and pets in situations of domestic abuse. It’s crucial for victims of domestic violence, providing them with structured guidance and a set of actionable steps that enhance their security in various situations.

Creating a Safety Plan
While You’re in the Relationship:

Identify Safe Areas in the Home: Know where to go if an argument occurs. Avoid small, enclosed spaces or rooms with weapons.
Develop a Code Word or Signal: Establish a word, phrase, or signal you can use with friends, family, or coworkers to indicate that you are in danger and need help.
Keep Essential Items Accessible: Have important items and documents readily available, so you can leave quickly.

When You’re Preparing to Leave:

Choose the Right Time: Plan to leave at a time when your abuser is least likely to be around.
Pack a Bag: Have a bag packed with necessary items (clothing, medications, etc.) and keep it in a safe, easily accessible place.
Pack important documents- like Driver’s License, Social Security Card (for you and all your children), birth certificates, Passports, Immigration Documents, etc
Secure Funds: Save money or make arrangements for finances.
Know Where to Go: Plan where you will go and how you will get there. Avoid places where the abuser might find you.

After Leaving the Abuser:

Change Locks: If you’re staying in your home, change the locks as soon as possible.
Obtain a Protective Order: If necessary, get a protective order and keep it on you at all times.
Change Routines: Alter your daily routines to avoid encountering the abuser.

Keeping Your Safety Plan Private

Use a Safe Device: When researching or creating your safety plan, use a computer or phone that the abuser does not have access to.
When you get a new cellphone do not download anything from the Cloud. Tracking apps could be in your cloud account.
Protect Your Online Information: Change passwords and enhance online security.
Inform Trusted Friends or Family: Let them know about your safety plan so they can also remain vigilant.

Seeking Help

Don’t hesitate to reach out for help:

National Domestic Violence Hotline (US): Call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or visit www.thehotline.org.
Local Shelters and Organizations: Find local resources that can provide assistance.
Law Enforcement: In an emergency, call 911 or your local authorities.

Remember, you are not alone, and creating a Safety Plan is a significant step towards ensuring your safety and wellbeing. Utilize the resources available and prioritize your security and peace of mind this Domestic Violence Awareness Month and beyond. Your life matters, and taking action to protect it is not just your right, but a crucial step towards a future free from abuse.

Tags awareness month, domestic violence, domestic violence awareness month, dp, dv nonprofit, safety plan, trauma informed

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The Houston Police Department gives a HUGE Shout-out of appreciation to all our partners with Houston Area Women’s Center

Post author By Blog Author
Post date October 5, 2023

The Houston Police Department (HPD) is a proud and long-standing partner with the Houston Area Women’s Center (HAWC). HAWC is a non-profit organization dedicated to providing critical resources for survivors of domestic violence and sexual assault. Trained advocates are available on their 24-Hour Hotline to provide survivors with information and resources to assess their danger, make a safety plan, find shelter, and access services such as counseling and legal help.

Coordinated responses have been recognized as a best practice in reducing domestic violence since the Violence Against Women Act was enacted over 20 years ago. This is particularly effective in our community when close-knit relationships develop and highly engaged domestic violence partners come together for collaborative efforts. Over the years, current and newly assigned investigators and supervisors attended the tours at the HAWC. The HAWC tours are conducted as part of our investigative training requirement for investigators and supervisors as it is beneficial to us to be able to share resource information with the survivors. On the HAWC tours, investigators meet with HAWC professionals and get to know each other by asking questions and sharing information on how to enhance supporting survivors. When Hurricane Harvey and the pandemic hit the Houston and surrounding areas, our strong relationships and trust allowed us all to streamline efforts to support and protect survivors of domestic violence and sexual assault. When face-to-face communication was not an option, we instantly continued communicating through Zoom meetings, electronic mail, and phone calls. We are excited to resume our in-person HAWC tours again for information-sharing regarding support and resources for survivors and their families. Recently, we had thirty new investigators and supervisors added to our Family Violence Unit and Adult Sex Crimes Unit who toured HAWC. Our investigators and supervisors are passionate about ending the epidemic of domestic violence and sexual assault. Each investigator and supervisor enhanced their individual knowledge regarding resources and how best to support the recovery after such a violent crime. A huge shout out to Deputy CEO Sonia Corrales and Thank You for always welcoming and guiding us through the HAWC and how survivors navigate the processes and take steps to recover from the violence. Also, we were joined by Director of Residential Services Pamela Ellis, Manager of Legal Service Jacklyn Guerra and Director of Violence Prevention and Training Michelle Sacks who are all hardworking dedicated professionals. We cannot express enough gratitude for all your continuous hard work that you put into everything you do for survivors! We are so grateful to have you as partners over the many years and thank you for all the hard work you are doing each day providing critical resources to the survivors of domestic violence and sexual assault!

About the Author

Kira Webster, Lieutenant at the Houston Police Department

Major Assault & Family Violence Division

Tags awareness month, domestic violence, domestic violence awareness month, family voilence division, houston police dept, sexual assault, sexualviolence, trauma informed

DVAM Voices Of Freedom

Silencing The Shame and Living in Agape: Your Journey Towards Healing

Post author By Blog Author
Post date October 5, 2023

As we step into October, a month dedicated to raising awareness about domestic violence, I want to address a crucial and often overlooked issue that affects countless lives. Why? Because I firmly believe that it’s time for us to collectively confront the pervasive yet often silenced impact of domestic violence.

Personal journeys through domestic violence can often feel profoundly isolating. I know this from my own experience. It was a lonely path until I discovered a community of support. Sadly, many of my loved ones, including church family members, didn’t know how to extend their support. That’s why I’m on a mission to give voice to this topic, recognizing that many women are affected by shame.

If you’ve made it to this paragraph, this topic must interest you. Let’s go deeper. Shame is a distorted identity we place on ourselves when we experience the perception of having done something dishonorable, immoral, or improper. Sometimes, we feel worthless, helpless, powerless, nameless, and hopeless. Seeing ourselves as “less” than is often connected to childhood trauma.

But here’s the profound truth: When we let go of our shame, we can feel more at peace, be happier with who we are, and experience true healing. When we embrace every facet of who we are, we tap into the transformative power of self-love.

Healing is closer than you think. You deserve to live in AGAPE. Healing can start today with:

Acceptance and Affirmations: Begin your healing journey by accepting that healing takes time and acknowledging your worth. Affirm yourself with positive self-talk, recognizing that you deserve love and support. Focus on the words “I am”! There is power in affirming your greatness.
Guidance from Professionals: Seek advice from trained therapists or counselors who can offer professional support, strategies, and confidential space to help you gain new tools to place in your tool kit for healing. The Harris County Domestic Violence Coordinating Council can be a resource for you. This community helped me in my healing journey.
Advocacy for Yourself: Learn what your rights are. Trust me, when you go through the process of self-advocacy, you will, in turn, be a resource for someone else. Advocacy raises your overall level of self-awareness and consciousness.
Pursuing Knowledge: Expand your knowledge about domestic violence, its psychological effects, and the resources available for survivors. Learning more about domestic violence helped me understand what my shame was rooted in.
Establishing Healthy Boundaries: Recognize the importance of setting and enforcing healthy boundaries to protect your emotional, mental, and physical well-being. NO. is a complete sentence.

Remember, you are not alone, you can silence the shame. We are ready to support you on your path to living a life free from shame.

If you’d like to learn more information about the Silencing the Shame series, please email our Voices of Freedom Ambassador, Lereca Monik. You can also check our weekly newsletter for her series announcements or check her Facebook page here: https://www.facebook.com/lereca.monik

About the Author

Leraca Monik is one of HCDVCC’s Voice of Freedom Ambassadors.

Tags awareness month, domestic violence, domestic violence awareness month, dp, sexual assault, sexualviolence, survivor turned advocate, trauma informed, vof

DVAM

The Importance Of Domestic Violence Awareness Month

Post author By Rebecca Councill
Post date September 27, 2023

Domestic Violence Awareness Month (DVAM) is observed every October in the United States. It is a month dedicated to raising awareness about the issues of domestic violence, honoring those who have died, supporting survivors, and mobilizing communities to take action to prevent this devastating crime. The month-long observance plays a crucial role in shedding light on an issue that is often cloaked in silence, and in empowering victims to find safety and healing. While we recognize October as Domestic Violence Awareness Month, we know every day is a battlefield for domestic violence victims, their families, their friends, and our community.

Statistics Highlight the Urgency of the Issue

Domestic violence is a pervasive and deadly issue. According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV), 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men have experienced some form of physical violence by an intimate partner. Moreover, on a typical day, domestic violence hotlines across the country receive over 20,000 calls, highlighting the urgency and prevalence of the issue.

The Impact of Domestic Violence

The impact of domestic violence extends beyond the physical harm inflicted on victims. It also encompasses emotional, psychological, and financial abuse, all of which can have long-term detrimental effects on victims and their children. The exposure to domestic violence can contribute to a range of emotional and psychological issues, including anxiety, depression, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Children who witness domestic violence are more likely to continue the cycle, either as perpetrators or victims in their adult lives.

Supporting Victims and Preventing Violence

Raising awareness about domestic violence is crucial in supporting survivors and preventing further violence. Domestic Violence Awareness Month provides a platform for survivors to share their stories, for communities to learn about the signs of abuse, and for organizations and individuals to share resources and information.

Providing Help Information

If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, it’s vital to seek help immediately. The National Domestic Violence Hotline is available 24/7 at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233), providing confidential assistance and connecting callers with local resources.

How Others Can Help

Everyone has a role to play in ending domestic violence:

Educate Yourself and Others: Learn about the signs of domestic violence and share this information with friends, family, and colleagues.
Listen and Believe: If someone discloses that they are experiencing abuse, listen to them, believe their story, and provide non-judgmental support.
Support Local Organizations: Donate your time or resources to local organizations working to support survivors and prevent domestic violence.
Advocate for Policies: Advocate for policies at local, state, and federal levels that support survivors and hold perpetrators accountable.

Domestic Violence Awareness Month is a critical time for communities to come together to support survivors, remember those who have lost their lives, and work collaboratively to end domestic violence. By raising awareness, providing resources, and fostering a culture of support and accountability, it’s possible to make significant strides towards ending domestic violence for good.

Tags awareness month, domestic violence, domestic violence awareness month, dp, sexual assault, sexualviolence, trauma informed

Op-eds

US Court Ruling response

Post author By Rebecca Councill
Post date February 13, 2023

RESPONSE

Local Domestic Violence Agencies stand united in outrage at the recent ruling on February 2, 2023, by the 5th US Circuit Court of Appeals declaring a law that restricts those with domestic violence restraining and protective orders from owning firearms unconstitutional. An Nisa, Aid to Victims of Domestic Violence, Bay Area Turning Point, The Bridge Over Troubled Waters, DAYA, Family Ties, Family Time, Fresh Spirit Wellness, The Empowered Survivor, Harris County Domestic Violence Coordinating Council, Houston Area Women’s Center, and Northwest Assistance Ministries Family Violence Program stand together in opposition of a ruling that has devastating and deadly consequences for those suffering the trauma of intimate partner violence.

According to the Texas Council on Family Violence’s Honoring Texas Victims report, in 2021 204 Texans were killed by their intimate partner, 46 in Harris County alone. Of the 46 killed in Harris County, 35 or 76% were killed by a firearm, and over 50% of those killed were black women. Additionally, 34% of the offenders were prohibited from possessing a firearm under Texas law and 40% were prohibited from possessing a firearm under federal law. The number one predictor of a domestic violence homicide is the threat of homicide and the ownership of a firearm. An 11 city study found “…increased risk of intimate partner femicide included perpetrator’s access to a gun and previous threat with a weapon” (Campbell, 2003). Yet three judges – in their infinite wisdom – found it unconstitutional to protect women. Aren’t laws intended to err on the side of protecting people rather than harming them? For the record, in Texas, protective orders are civil legal lawsuits that are granted when domestic violence has occurred and there is a strong likelihood that it will continue. Protective orders help create boundaries of safety for a survivor by restricting harm doers from going to survivors’ homes, workplaces, and/or schools while also strictly forbidding the person from communicating in a threatening or harassing manner. These orders can be granted for any amount of time, and prior to this decision, required the surrender of a firearm for the duration of the order.

This court ruling is one more devastating decision, especially for survivors in Texas, that creates greater challenges for them to become safer. We know that firearms are the number one method of homicide for victims of intimate partner violence and rulings like this only send the message that the safety of women is not a priority. As Harris County continues to see the highest number of domestic violence related fatalities in the state of Texas, it is incumbent upon us all to ensure access to services and protections including the recognition that underserved communities of color experience the highest rates of homicides and the lowest rates of accessing formal services for protections.

One of the strongest protections has been the requirement of surrendering firearms when there is a protective order in place. This law has SAVED lives even as a voluntary program. Wait, what? Yes, you read that right – a voluntary gun surrender program. Currently, in Harris County, if a protective order is granted against a harm doer who owns a gun, they are offered a way to voluntarily surrender it through Harris County’s Safe Surrender Program. Thanks to the laxed and conflicting laws about gun ownership in Texas, actually requiring someone to surrender it with some type of investigation, enforcement and/or accountability does not happen. While Harris County’s Safe Surrender Program is not perfect, it is our best attempt at giving an alternative in adhering to the mandate to surrender firearms when a protective order is granted. It is a step towards increasing safety for survivors. Now even this small step in progress feels insignificant as this court decision strips survivors of more and more protections that should be due to them under the law.

Countless numbers of women have relayed stories to advocates in our community about the threats they received to be shot and killed, and for many women, this threat is made real. In 2022 our community experienced extremely high rates of deadly intimate partner violence and ever-increasing felony level assaults. No one can watch the news on a nightly basis without hearing about another tragic death. Families are suffering and front-line workers are exhausted and cannot keep up with the need. Our community should never have to face losing – a neighbor, a family member, a friend, a Houstonian – due to intimate partner violence. And…now this court ruling supporting the ownership of firearms when there is a protective order – UNACCEPTABLE.

Along with the highest number of homicides, Harris County continues to see the highest turn away rate for emergency shelter, a housing waitlist over 900 families deep, and long wait lists for counseling and therapeutic services. One domestic violence homicide can cost a community close to 15 million dollars (DeLIsis et al., 2010). This cost cannot even begin to account for the loss of a mother to her children, or a family member. Yet – we can put our priority on ensuring that the right to bear firearms is more important than the right to be SAFE.

We will not be quiet, we will not let go, we will unite our voices of outrage and the need to support laws that SAVE lives, not destroy them. Our leaders and decision makers need to hear us and make change to eradicate the laws that support the senseless death of survivors at the hands of a would be loved one. There is still much work to be done and we will not stop advocating for protection for victims and survivors that are affected by the lack of laws and protections from firearms.
NO MORE

NNEDV Statement Regarding United States v. Rahimi

BWJP Reacts to the United States Court of Appeals for the Fifth Circuit’s Disappointing Ruling Undermining Federal Firearms Prohibitions for Persons Who Have Committed Acts of Domestic Violence – BWJP

https://tcfv.org/wp-content/uploads/Call-to-Action-Gun-Violence-Final.pdf

Tags domestic violence, domestic violence awareness month, trauma informed

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