April 29 @ 9:00 am – 12:00 pm CDT
Join us as Dr. Valera discusses the prevalence of brain injury, and it’s association with cognitive and psychiatric difficulties in women who have experienced intimate partner violence
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Tag: dv nonprofit
Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month: What to Look For & How to Help
Teen relationships should be fun, safe, and built on mutual respect. But for too many teens, dating turns into something dangerous—something that hurts instead of uplifts. February is Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month, a time to shine a light on an issue that affects 1 in 3 teens in the U.S. If you’re in an unhealthy relationship, know someone who is, or just want to be prepared to support a friend, keep reading.
Spotting the Signs of an Unhealthy Relationship
Teen dating violence isn’t just physical. It can be emotional, psychological, digital, sexual, or financial abuse. The person being abused may not even realize what’s happening at first. Here’s what to look for:
- Extreme jealousy or possessiveness – A partner who constantly checks your phone, gets mad if you talk to others, or accuses you of cheating without reason.
- Controlling behavior – They tell you who you can and can’t hang out with, what to wear, or how to act.
- Love bombing, then withdrawal – At first, they’re over-the-top sweet, texting nonstop, giving gifts, making big promises. Then they pull away, punish you with silence, or make you feel like you’re “too much.”
- Embarrassing or humiliating you – Making fun of you in front of others, calling you names, or spreading rumors.
- Threats or intimidation – Saying they’ll hurt themselves if you leave, threatening to ruin your reputation, or using fear to control you.
- Physical harm – Pushing, hitting, throwing things, or any kind of physical violence—even just once.
- Digital abuse – Hacking into your accounts, demanding passwords, sending unwanted explicit photos, or tracking your location.
Red Flags That Shouldn’t Be Ignored
They rush the relationship and say things like, “I’ve never felt this way before” within days or weeks. You feel like you have to walk on eggshells around them. They pressure you into things you’re uncomfortable with—whether it’s sex, drugs, or skipping school. They make you doubt yourself—gaslighting you into thinking you’re overreacting or imagining things. They isolate you from your family and friends, making you dependent on them. You feel afraid to leave because you don’t know what they’ll do.
How to Help a Friend in an Abusive Relationship
If you notice a friend pulling away, acting different, or making excuses for their partner’s toxic behavior, they may be in an abusive relationship. It’s not always easy to get through to them, but here’s what you can do:
- Believe them. If they open up, listen without judgment. Don’t minimize their experience by saying, “It’s probably not that bad.”
- Avoid blaming them. They may not leave right away, and that’s okay. Instead of, “Why don’t you just break up?” try, “I’m here whenever you need me.”
- Help them see the signs. Gently point out concerning behaviors. “I’ve noticed your partner always checks your phone. Does that make you uncomfortable?”
- Stay connected. Abusers isolate their victims. Keep inviting your friend to hang out and check in often.
- Offer a way out. Help them make a safety plan (more on that below) or offer to go with them to talk to a trusted adult.
Getting Out of an Abusive Relationship
Leaving isn’t easy, especially when emotions are involved. But safety comes first. Here’s how to make an exit plan:
Talk to someone you trust – A parent, school counselor, teacher, coach, or friend. You don’t have to do this alone. Plan your breakup in a safe place – If you’re afraid of their reaction, break up in a public place or over text. Do not meet alone. Block them on social media and your phone – This prevents them from harassing or manipulating you after the breakup. Gather evidence – If they’ve been threatening or abusive over text, save screenshots. You may need them later. Know your escape route – If they show up at your school or house, have a plan on where you’ll go and who you’ll call. Get professional help – Love Is Respect (866-331-9474) and The National Domestic Violence Hotline (800-799-7233) have 24/7 support.
You’re Not Alone – Support Is Out There
No one deserves to feel unsafe in a relationship. If you or someone you know is experiencing dating violence, help is available:
Love Is Respect – Call 866-331-9474 or text “LOVEIS” to 22522 for confidential support. National Domestic Violence Hotline – 800-799-7233 or chat at thehotline.org. Talk to a trusted adult – A teacher, coach, school counselor, or family member can help you navigate your next steps.
Dating should feel exciting, safe, and uplifting—never scary or suffocating. If something doesn’t feel right, trust yourself. Help is always available, and you deserve better.
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February 13
@
2:30 pm
–
4:00 pm
CST
Teen Dating Violence Panel
Who you choose to date speaks volumes about your values, priorities, and self-worth—it reflects more about you than your partner.
Did you know most teens face heightened risks of unhealthy relationships between the ages of 11 and 14? Why is this critical stage so impactful?
This is the time when young people begin navigating the transition to peer-driven dynamics, gaining independence, and exploring new opportunities—sports, cheerleading, school activities, and more. While parental support remains present, direct supervision often decreases.
At this age, teens feel invincible, push boundaries, and are curious to try new things. While we prepare them to excel academically and athletically, we often overlook equipping them to recognize the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships.
Just as we encourage preparation for major tests, we must also prepare them for the complexities of dating and relationships. Teaching teens about healthy relationship dynamics now helps prevent future violence and sets them up for success in all aspects of life.
Join us for this important event and help empower the next generation with the tools they need for safe, respectful, and healthy relationships.
About our Panel:
Stefanie serves as the Community Outreach Coordinator with the Harris County Domestic Violence Coordinating Council-(HCDVCC). Here she provides workshops and presentations throughout Houston and surrounding Harris County to help community members be able to recognize, respond, and refer those who are impacted by domestic violence. She also teaches prevention strategies and facilitates groups for Youth on Healthy Relationships and Teen Dating Violence Awareness.
Leila Wood, PhD, MSSW (she/her) is Professor at the University of Texas Health Science Center at Houston (UTHealth) McGovern Medical School, Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences. Leila is the Director of Research and Evaluation at the Center for Violence Prevention and a Social Worker. Leila’s scholarship focuses on community, economic, and school-based intimate partner violence, dating violence, stalking, elder abuse, and sexual assault prevention and intervention approaches across the lifespan.
Ellen Wilder is the Expect Respect Training Manager at The SAFE Alliance in Austin, TX, where I have the privilege of supporting agencies nationwide in addressing and preventing teen dating violence. As a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with a Master’s in Education, I bring a unique blend of clinical expertise and teaching experience to my work in training, consulting, and direct care. My career spans diverse settings, roles, and populations, but a common thread is my passion for building deep relationships and partnering with individuals on their healing and growth journeys.
theciajenkins@hcdvcc.org
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Reflecting on a Powerful Domestic Violence Awareness Month
As October comes to an end, the pressing issue of gender-based violence, particularly domestic violence, remains at the forefront of our mission. Throughout Domestic Violence Awareness Month (DVAM), the Harris County Domestic Violence Coordinating Council (HCDVCC), alongside our incredible community partners, dedicated time to amplifying the conversation around recognizing, responding to, and making referrals for domestic violence.
Throughout the month, the HCDVCC team had the privilege of supporting our partners at various events, including The Bridge, Fresh Spirit, Aid to Victims of Dometic Abuse (AVDA), and An Nisa Hope Center, who graciously invited us to participate in their galas and luncheons.
The Communications Department was busy during October appearing on KPRC, FOX 26 and KHOU discussing important issues about Domestic Violence. Thank you to all the stations for making domestic violence a feature during October. HCDVCC also participated in a panel discussion with AVDA, The Bridge, the District Attorney’s Office and the Houston Police Department at the United Way’s Interagency Meeting discussing issues and resources related to domestic violence for their Community Partners.
We partnered with AVDA and Daya to host an Interfaith Community Dialogue on Domestic Violence. Advocates were joined by Faith Leaders for table talk discussions on Domestic Violence. After the Dialogue, we held an evening of Remembrance, Caring and Hope to celebrate survivors and honor those we lost to domestic violence in the last year. We were honored to have several families who lost a loved one join us for this moving event.
On October 9th, our Senior Director of Operations and Communications, Amy Smith, had the unique opportunity to meet with ten members of the Korean National Police Agency and provide training on the dynamics of domestic violence, Coordinated Community Responses (CCR), Risk Assessments, and Safety Planning. During their three-week visit to Houston, hosted by Sam Houston State University’s College of Criminal Justice, the group also met with representatives from the Harris County Sheriff’s Office, Houston Police Department, and other local agencies to compare international approaches to protecting vulnerable populations.
Thecia Jenkins, our Training and Outreach Director, participated in an event that was hosted in collaboration with State Representative Jolanda Jones and AVDA. This impactful session focused on identifying lethality risks in domestic violence situations and preventing abuse by promoting healthy relationships. Attendees were able to access real-time resources and connect with one another, sharing personal stories and finding support.
Our Voices of Freedom ambassadors—a remarkable group of survivors who have thrived and now lead as advocates—spearheaded a four-part social media series on Facebook. These posts addressed critical topics such as dismantling domestic violence myths, the journey from victimization to advocacy, engaging men in the conversation, faith-based responses to abuse, and the importance of self-care for both survivors and advocates.
Our Education and Outreach team was quite active this month partnering with local colleges and universities to lead discussions on healthy relationships. They reached over 700 youth and young adults, sparking conversations on domestic violence prevention.
The Team hosted a Family Fun Day in partnership with Village Green. This was one of the highlights of the month—a fun-filled day emphasizing the importance of community connections. This event also served as a precursor to next year’s Youth Boot Camp on Healthy Relationships.
The Team also hosted two outreach workshops one on Creating a Culture of Care: How healthy relationships and bystander intervention can make a difference. The participants learned essential skills to foster healthy relationships and intervene in potentially harmful situations. The second workshop was an Accountability Walk or Taking Responsibility for Our Actions and Ending Violence. This powerful, interactive activity allowed participants to step into the shoes of domestic violence offenders, raising awareness of the challenges they face on the road to rehabilitation.
This October also saw HCDVCC’s Client Support Groups engage in a creative and therapeutic project, where participants—mothers and children—used art to envision their personal, professional, and psychological futures.
We were honored to be in the company of amazing people and agencies when HCDVCC received one of Harris County District Attorney Kim Ogg’s Community Partner Awards.
While October has come to an end, our work is far from over. As we move toward the end of this year and into 2025, let’s continue to have these crucial conversations and advocate for those affected by domestic violence. Together, we can keep making a difference.
